"Out of Germany I come
Great ideals, but little room
Maimed me from the start
I carry from my mother's womb
A ferocious heart..."
- after W.B. Yeates

Just A Man

to Davika

Sky is clear tonight
Sky is clear tomorrow

A star is lost
It once was sparkling in my hands
The star is gone
I'll never touch you again
Well, I'm just a man ...

Mind is set tonight
Mind is set tomorrow

And every night I shut my eyes
So I can see the white in my lies
While memories shine so bright
I dream about that special time
with you-now gone forever ...

``Men are born to love -
Though often they just try
Like Icarus, to fly too high
And far too lonely as they ought
They burn their wings
And crash right down to earth...

To get to know the terrible powers
To handle only Gods are blessed -
But hell, I'm just a man ...''

And when at night I shut my eyes
I think of you and start to cry
I'm just a man who had to try ...

Since I fell into your hands
You're burning me
Since you mean too much to me -
So here's the last of me

The Last Of Me

When a love breaks up
And never blooms
And it hurts the least for -
Whoever saw it first

First to be and the last of me

Love lasts longer than a lifetime
Takes the least amount of effort
Feels better than a bargain
Just to know you're still there...

Why can't you see
I'm just a man so there's only
one me, and that me is me...

I know where but I cannot share
You'll drop me a line, and I'll
be here waiting for you if I dare -

Please try again, Try again ...?

Messiah

Well, I'm a self-proclaimed Messiah
Maybe I'm just a blashemes liar?
In any case I'll make you see
However, please don't follow me ...

I've turned my life to superstition
And don't need no one on my mission
In any case there's more to be
However, please don't follow me ...

Shadow Boxing

to ...

Last round, final gong
Don't think I'm at where I belong
There's nowhere left to run or hide ...
Who can win? Who will win?
When all becomes a stupid question of pride?

No more reason in the prison of your schemes
Mirror, mirror-things are getting clearer

It's just us and our shadows dancing round the ring
I've tried to stop it, for there's no means for you to win
Are we only shadow boxing?

Time out, way out
I'm looking for a different way to tell
Meeting you was fun somehow, but I won't look over hell
And in the end my inside will come out to play bob 'n' weave
So, be concious of my every move
I won't cheat but can no longer ignore the truth

No more time to walk this line
Mirror, mirror-your misthakes are getting clearer

It's just us and our shadows dancing round the ring
I've tried to stop it, for there's no means for you to win
Thank God we're only shadow boxing.

Your decison won't blur my vison
Mirror, mirror -
who beats next ...?

Forever & Unconditionally

to Heidi

So just tell me what can I do?
what do I have to say to change your mind
and make you see the way I do?
there is only one thing to me
and it's coming straight from the bottom of my heart

Loving you, unconditionally
Loving you, unconditionally
That's what I want to be
just what you are to me ...

Can you see why it's so hard for me?
after all these years and locked-up tears
to break apart from the the world I hold
right into another yet to unfold that's closer to your heart?
and since we don't get younger, we're growing old
and so has our love, it's grown far too cold ...

Loving you, unconditionally
proposing to a heart that's yet not free
And all I want you to be
is just what you are to me ...

And yes, I know it's impossible
since both of our hands are full, and we can't let lose
anyway, here's the way I choose, to tell you that I'm still

Loving you, forever & unconditionally

Self-Portrait

(I know)

I have a thousand ideas, you may not heared my name
I live alone with my visions, not looking for fortune & fame
Sometimes sad, not sure what to speak of, I'm out on another plane
The words I might say are a mystery, nobody sure what I'm saying...

But I know, know more than he or you
No one could see, if few
Where am I going to?

I am in search of the answers, 'bout nature and what we are
I am trying to do it a new way, but I'm not bound to be a star
But nobody understands me, I always feel I was knocked away
I'm into it deeper and deeper
And nobody's gonna get hold of me one fine day ...

But I know, know more than he or you
No one could see, if few
Where am I going to?
And I try, but I know before soon I'll died
And when I leave, will people start to cry?
Where am I going to?

I have a different idea, the glimpse of a master plan
It's easy to see into the future, for a true visionary man
But whatever I've seen, it will with me die away ...

Yes, I know, know much too much be be sane at all
Nobody else can see, but a chosen few
No one could see it through ...

Beggar & Hanger-On?

to Heike

Well, I know that you don't love me
'Caus you made this point quite clear to me
Take a look, what are you seeing?
Another angry young man, with empty hands ...

And you know I'd need a healer
Nervous twitching of my hands ...
Nervous twitchin' ...

Gotta find someone to help me fight this feelin'
'Caus I'm falling down to pieces & I can't get outta bed ...

Beggar & Hanger-On? Is that what you made from me?
Beggar & Hanger-On? Have I really come this far?
Beggar & Hanger-On? 'n you just chip me away ...

So I bury my soul beneath a piece of paper
'Caus I know the end comes near ...
... but is that really what I fear?
You made me feel like a Beggar & Hanger-On
Someone to waste his time on you

Was I that wrong?, since I don't need you
I know that sounds reckless and unfair -
Well my childhood's days are far behind
So I guess that's just another cross to bear

There was a time, when there was a reason
To take the ghost and lock it up inside
Well, maybe I'm down, maybe I'm bleeding
But there're still some rounds to go -
Like anything love is born to die ...

Am I a Beggar & Hanger-On?
Why do you chip me away?
Scribbling & scratching on the paper
I bury my soul in a sea of wet ink
So, I'm sittin' here staring as time goes by -
and all I do is think ...

Beggar & Hanger-On?

(recurse)

Just Good Friends?

to Oggi

There's something I'd like to ask you before it's too late,
It's been on my mind for a very long time
and scares me now more than it did before,
now that there's so much more at stake
It seems we're so close yet so far away.

You turned me down gently, send me out of order,
when I declared my true feelings, after I played
my part of the brother in arms,
the shoulder to cry on...
We've always been so close, yet so far away.

What would you do, if I got down on my knees to you?
Would you hold it against me, and run away one more time?
What would you do, if I opened up my heart to you?
Would I just be another who's waisting his time?
Oggi, are we just good friends?

Do I really need to ask you?
I'm pretty sure to know your answer by now,
Do we just play a game where we try to pretend,
that all that's between us, is all that's between us?
And all we can rely on is just being good friends?

Is that all we depend on?
Resigned to share mugs of cafes, and pieces of fairy cake?
Sunday walks through the pouring rain?
And talks on your Belgian laced bodys, that you hide away from me?
Reciting our failures as if we needed
Proof or regret,
Of what we might have had?
And what should have been?

(Or will be?)

Song for Melanie

from a Jester to a Goddess

I, I know I'm a dreamer
It's easy to see I'll never be your believer
While my hopes fly high through the air
Now, I'm wide awake
And I want to take you there...

The things that you told me
I don't know if I was dreaming
And dreams aren't enough
Life is so lonely
I need something to believe in
Why do you hate me?
Can't you see it meant everything to me?
That's enough.

Melanie, let me hear it said so I am sure
Answer me-can't you see that's all I'm waitin' for?
Here I am on my knees once more
Melanie

Time must lead us somewhere
I don't want to wait, ever since-
I know you won't take me there

The way how you told me
I don't know if I was dreaming
And dreams aren't enough
Waitin's so lonely
I need something to believe in
Something to work for
Can't you see SAFIER's meant all to me?
Now it's enough.

Melanie let me hear so I am sure
Answer me-can't you see that's all I'm waitin' for?
Here I am on my knees
Oh, I'm begging you please
Melanie

Melanie ...
Melanie ...
Melanie ...

(fade)

When I see tomorrow

to Ute

When I see tomorrow I see you Babe
When I look around I see you everywhere ...
Your face is edged into my mind,
and all I have to do is wait until you realise
we're two of a kind.

When I see my future I see you Babe
When I see my kids I know they gonna have your face ...

Star

to HPS

How long can I stay -
on top of the crop?
All tightened up? frozen the smile?
Avoiding the fight? avoiding the lie?
King of the world? with a hollow man's eye?
Will I get what I want? Or be cursed with my dreams?
I hope for my sake, I've got what it takes ...

How long can I stand -
living under the lense?
With the poisoned kiss of success?
In this ensuing, all consuming mess?
Messages of love - they arrive every day of
People I've touched, or waisted away ...
People I don't even know, give me no choice ...

And now I'm sick to my stomach
I stopped listen to strangers voices
Or the shape of their faces, or the sound of my name
I look at pictures of myself -
but it's someone I don't know
They still call me a genius -
for that's easier to sell ...

And the fire in my belly, has turned into hell -
Don't worry about me, for I've got what it takes
Although I feel like a fake ...
IS THAT WHAT YOU WARNED ME?
I hope for my sake - I've got what it takes ...
I've got what it takes
to survive this smeared masquera ...

Or be spoilt to death!

Dust in the Wind

by Kerry Livgren

When I close my eyes
Only for a moment, and the moment's gone ...
All my dreams, pass before my eyes, a curiosity -

Dust in the Wind
All we are is Dust in the Wind

Same old song -
Just a drop of water in an endless sea
All we knew crumbles to the ground
Are we refused to see?

Dust in the Wind
All we are is Dust in the Wind

And I don't hang on
Nothing lasts forever but the earth 'n' sky
And it slips away
And all your money won't help to

Dust in the Wind,
(all we are is Dust in the Wind)
Dust in the Wind,
(everything is Dust in the Wind)
Dust in the Wind...

Something waiting...

to Anja-Maria

"While I surf away at night
I listen to my music dreaming ..."

After all these years
I have become too cynical and jaded
but that's what left when hatred
eats your inside out ...

There's something waiting to happen ...
Something between you and me ...
We can talk without talking - from inside to inside
Something's ready to fly ...
' Can't wait 'til we're alone at last
And there's just you and I ...

"I'd like to lie beside you
listen to you sleeping ..."

There's a feeling on the inside, that
There's something waiting to happen ...
At the edge of exploding, at the dawn of a dream -
Something wild and ferocious ...
Something mild and becalmed ...
Something's waiting to happen ...

"I hear the darkness breathe
and the rain against the window ..."

Anything you really like, for
Life is so much more but a gamble on
Warm injections or
Cold rejections -
I have waited to feel this
for much too long in my life ...

Thankyou.

Jetzt

Leg' die Hand auf die Zeit
und komm' mit mir ins Jetzt
Ich weiss nicht was ist wichtig?
nur das ich Dich nicht verletz'
Sagst Du mir bitte wie Du heißt?
Du kennst mich nicht doch
ich liebe Dich -
Jetzt ...

Waiting in the Wings...

Sometimes it isn't so easy, to lead a life on your own
I can imagine why sometimes, you just let go
Sometimes it isn't so easy, to have a mind of your own
Especially when you're cold and frustrated, and feel so alone...

Just let me be your favourite stranger-
I can help you more than your know
And all I have to do is wait
'til again you let yourself go...

You won't be alone, for
I'll stand here waiting
I'll be here, and won't dissapear
Waiting in the wings...
You're never alone, and if you need someone, just call-
Sometimes I might be out of view, but I'm watching you
Waiting in the wings...

Now, that I know all your little secrets
About your boy-toys and men-
You seem to trust me and should do
And I'm the one you can tell
It's not a sign of your weakness
All what you said is o.k.
Don't forget you're not alone anymore-
I'll be there when you need me
Waiting in the wings...

Sometime life ain't so easy-
When you don't have a mind of your own
I know exactly why sometimes
You lose control...

Hypnotized

to Claudia

When I realised my whole world's spinning round
you and I felt I was losing ground, and I was losing touch with
reality, and all I could do is remember the look in your eyes.
The way that you pushed me inside.
And all I got in my defense is my lovin' innocence,
- well I was hypnotized.

A magic spell you cast on me, and yours is all I want to be
I heared church bells ringing out loud.
Reminds me of my Childhood's whereabouts.
And sunshine falling down on me, the rains,
while horses fly across the plains.
And I would always love to come back to feel your energy.
I still remember the look in your eyes.
You make me feel so humble inside.
And all I got in my defense is a lover's innocence,
- well I am hypnotized.

We know it won't be easy, it's only easy to get hypnotized
So won't you tell me what you think? Shall we get into the ring?
And fight for a life that's ours, and all ours?
It won't be easy though, all I know is that you've got me hypnotized.
It won't be easy, but if we've got those hearts that burn on
the inside, it won't last that long to find that love is blind.
You're my leisure on a sunny beach, so please take the hand
I reach out to touch you, caress you, and bless you ...
Let's tangle with the flames, of a burning heart's desire.
And all we need in our defence is the passion's innocence
- we've just gotta get hypnotized.

Hey, you, I'm waiting for a sign, help me realign my broken
world, I know it ain't a crime, but the sweetest of all sins
for both of us to get hypnotized.
Don't you think that there's a way for me.
My final chance? Judgement day? How do I need to be?
And all you have to do is to realise...

Let's get hypnotized.

Weirdo

Weirdo, Psycho, Gazpacho ...

Gazpacho

to Colette

See me falling from a poet's moon
Did I learn to much too soon?
I took a dive and swallowed all I could
Is that what it's meant to be or should?
Now, there's really nothing left to fight about
And I waiste my time in cryin' aloud ...

Punching at the sky
They say the Jester's lost his mind again
They say I'd better be bullet proof, and that I'd show no pain
It seems the Jester is misunderstood again -

When life becomes a pain, a surgery
You meant much too much for me ...

They say the Jester's lost his grip again
And that I'm raging like a bull to an empty ring
I thought you would forgive the Jester anything?

Now she's a gone and I'm alone again
And I won't fight to win back her affection

IS THIS WHAT IS MEANS TO BE A MAN?
BOXING UP ALL MY EMOTION?

So I just turn around
And cry out loud, and tell it to the ocean ...

Punching at the sky
They say the Jester's lost his mind again
They say the Jester's counting on his numbered days
And he never lost a fight in his whole life
But now he has some trouble sleeping through the night
The whiskey and the white lines helped me through the day

I thought they would forgive a Jester anything?
But then again ...

Vaya Gazpacho!